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I Heart Broccoli.

January 3, 2018 by Exangel

I love broccoli.

I know you do, too. You are like me. You love kale, cabbage, brussels sprouts, BROCCOLINI.

Yes, broccolini. The ridiculously svelte and pretentious version of broccoli. You even love that.

In which case, you feel the same way I do: while there are a million and one ways to deliciously cook said broccoli, a new way makes you just about as happy as does the discovery of a new star.

So it was with me, one issue of FOOD AND WINE. Yes, FOOD AND WINE, that magazine that is practically the broccolini of the food magazine world. The magazine that so frequently annoys me by its aspirant pretensions (does anyone in the world actually need a $500 wine cooler? does anyone in the world actually decorate their platters with authentic arctic moss? does anyone in the world…but you get the idea). Every so often I think with a sigh that I will finally give up my subscription, and stop feeling the need to a.) throw the magazine across the room, while shouting, ‘that is the stupidest thing I ever heard of’ and/or b.) call a chef friend and read, in a voice filled with disbelief, ‘this latest idiocy they’ve got trending out there’.

But then…it happens. The way it happens sometimes that the woman you swore you would never lunch with again, after she spent the whole time picking at her designer salad while telling you about her Moroccan vacation, suddenly reveals herself to be a good friend. Yes. The way sometimes after scorning broccolini as a passing fad, it gets marked down in the supermarket, and you grudgingly buy it, only to find it’s perfectly delightful steamed and covered with lemon butter.

So it was with the last issue of FOOD AND WINE. Because, bless its heart, there it was. A new way of cooking broccoli. More importantly, a new, easier, mega delicious way to cook broccoli. And broccolini, too, as I discovered on further experimentation.

Now as you know, there are many ways to cook broccoli: Steamed and served with a squeeze of lemon. Stir-fried with crushed garlic cloves and red pepper pods. Boiled till crisp and bright green, drained, and served with hollandaise. Chilled, diced, tossed with vinaigrette, and topped with chopped hard-boiled egg. Cooked in the oven for about an hour with chopped bacon and sliced onion (khaki colored, yes, I know, but oh, how yum).

I could go on.

So I thought I knew every way to cook broccoli. But this was pretentious of moi. Because this is probably my new favorite way: you heat the oven to 500 degrees, spread the broccoli on a cookie sheet, mix it with cut up red onion wedges and some olive oil, salt and pepper. Roast till done, then drizzle on browned butter mixed with capers and a bit of fish sauce. Divine.

The recipe called for broccoli crowns alone, but I always peel my broccoli stalks, cut them into little wedges, and cook with the tops. I love those stalks the best, actually. And those red onions: it would be great with them, but I usually have yellow ones in the house. The rest of it, though, was super. Super easy, super delicious.

Like this:

Heat oven to 500 degrees.

On a cookie sheet, take a whole head of broccoli, flowerets separated and stalk peeled, cut lengthwise and across to small lengths, and spread out, tossing with an onion cut into wedges, two tablespoons of olive oil (mild is best here, you can use any mild oil, come to think of it), and kosher salt and pepper (any salt is good, but F&W recommends kosher, and I agreed with them that’s best). Bake without tossing or fussing with it at all until it’s browned and tender, which takes about twenty minutes.

Meanwhile, melt a half stick of unsalted butter and cook, stirring once in awhile, over medium heat (watch it!) until it turns brown and, as they say, ‘smells nutty’. This takes about five minutes or so. When done, take it off the heat, and add (oh, joy!) a tablespoon of capers and a teaspoon of fish sauce. (Definitely take it off the heat before adding, or you’re going to have spatters of sauce all over your stove. Just sayin’.)

Pour over the broccoli and serve.

F&W recommends the broccoli be spread on a platter. But I just made some brown rice, put it into bowls, plopped the broccoli and onions on top, and poured the sauce over. We had this with cucumber salad (vinegar, soy sauce, pepper, and a little sugar atop sliced cucumbers), and it was divine.

A few nights later, I tried it with broccolini. Another success, though I have to admit I should have peeled those skinny little stalks first.

All of this goes to show: you can’t judge a food magazine by its cover. Or anyone, really.  You really can’t. You have to look at its true soul. Because true soul makes the best recipes, for broccoli and for friendship. That’s what I think, anyway.

Bon appetit!

Filed Under: Jam Today Tagged With: broccoli, broccolini, capers, fish sauce, FOOD AND WINE

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In This Issue.

  • Who Was Dorothy?
  • Those Evil Spirits.
  • The Screaming Baboon.
  • Her.
  • A Tale of Persistence.
  • A Conversation with Steve Hugh Westenra.
  • Person Number Twelve.
  • Dream Shapes.
  • Cannon Beach.
  • The Muse.
  • Spring.
  • The Greatness that was Greece.
  • 1966, NYC; nothing like it.
  • Sun Shower.
  • The Withering Weight of Being Perceived.
  • Broken Clock.
  • Confession.
  • Francis Coppola’s Apocalypse.
  • Sometimes you die, I mean that people do.
  • True (from “My Life with Dogs”).
  • Fragmentary musings on birds and bees.
  • 12 Baking Essentials to Always Have in Your Poetry.
  • Broad Street.
  • A Death in Alexandria.
  • My Forked Tongue.
  • Swan Lake.
  • Long Division.
  • Singing against the muses.
  • Aphorisms from “What Remains to Be Said”.

In The News.

That cult classic pirate/sci fi mash up GREENBEARD, by Richard James Bentley, is now a rollicking audiobook, available from Audible.com. Narrated and acted by Colby Elliott of Last Word Audio, you’ll be overwhelmed by the riches and hilarity within.

“Captain Sylvestre de Greybagges is your typical seventeenth-century Cambridge-educated lawyer turned Caribbean pirate, as comfortable debating the virtues of William Shakespeare, Isaac Newton, and compound interest as he is wielding a cutlass, needling archrival Henry Morgan, and parsing rum-soaked gossip for his next target. When a pepper monger’s loose tongue lets out a rumor about a fleet loaded with silver, the Captain sets sail only to find himself in a close encounter of a very different kind.

After escaping with his sanity barely intact and his beard transformed an alarming bright green, Greybagges rallies The Ark de Triomphe crew for a revenge-fueled, thrill-a-minute adventure to the ends of the earth and beyond.

This frolicsome tale of skullduggery, jiggery-pokery, and chicanery upon Ye High Seas is brimming with hilarious puns, masterful historical allusions, and nonstop literary hijinks. Including sly references to Thomas Pynchon, Treasure Island, 1940s cinema, and notable historical figures, this mélange of delights will captivate readers with its rollicking adventure, rich descriptions of food and fashion, and learned asides into scientific, philosophical, and colonial history.”

THE SUPERGIRLS is back, revised and updated!

supergirls-take-1

In The News.

Newport Public Library hosted a three part Zoom series on Visionary Fiction, led by Tod.  

And we love them for it, too.

The first discussion was a lively blast. You can watch it here. The second, Looking Back to Look Forward can be seen here.

The third was the best of all. Visions of the Future, with a cast of characters including poets, audiobook artists, historians, Starhawk, and Mary Shelley. Among others. Link is here.

In the News.

SNOTTY SAVES THE DAY is now an audiobook, narrated by Last Word Audio’s mellifluous Colby Elliott. It launched May 10th, but for a limited time, you can listen for free with an Audible trial membership. So what are you waiting for? Start listening to the wonders of how Arcadia was born from the worst section of the worst neighborhood in the worst empire of all the worlds since the universe began.

In The News.

If you love audio books, don’t miss the new release of REPORT TO MEGALOPOLIS, by Tod Davies, narrated by Colby Elliott of Last Word Audio. The tortured Aspern Grayling tries to rise above the truth of his own story, fighting with reality every step of the way, and Colby’s voice is the perfect match for our modern day Dr. Frankenstein.

In The News.

Mike Madrid dishes on Miss Fury to the BBC . . .

Tod on the Importance of Visionary Fiction

Check out this video of “Beyond Utopia: The Importance of Fantasy,” Tod’s recent talk at the tenth World-Ecology Research Network Conference, June 2019, in San Francisco. She covers everything from Wind in the Willows to the work of Kim Stanley Robinson, with a look at The History of Arcadia along the way. As usual, she’s going on about how visionary fiction has an important place in the formation of a world we want and need to have.

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