Tiger Lily Reports from Occupy Wall Street.

by Wendy Darling

 

 

Hey Girl–

Haven’t spoken to you in a couple of weeks. Some real eye-opening stuff going down over here. So, I had a date with GI Joe. He’s 45 minutes late, and I’m thinking the big lug has stood me up when I get a text from him. (BTW, this iPhone 4S is SWEET!) Anyway, he says he’s down at Occupy Wall Street with some of his old army buddies. They’re going to be stuck there for a while and I should meet him there. I was at Odeon, so it’s just a short walk down there (I’m wearing my vintage Westwood flat heel boots, so it’s no big deal). I was not prepared for what I saw, with the crowds and the police and all. It was overwhelming. And there’s my Joe, holding the line with a bunch of his buddies, protesting the protestors for the cops. I didn’t know all of the guys but I recognized Sad Sack, Private Benjamin, Gomer Pyle and Beetle Bailey. He didn’t budge an inch, just gave me a wink when he saw me. What a guy.

I walked around the area and ran into some of our cronies. Rosie the Riveter was giving the protestors pep talks, and Wonder Woman was stirring up the crowd with some Amazonian victory chant. Aunt Jemima was there passing out food to the people who were camped out in Zuccotti Park. (Side note, have you had her chicken and waffles? To die for!) Since the press has not been covering this protest all that much, Hildy Johnson, Lois Lane, and Tintin were on the scene. Mr. Peabody had set them up with a website where they could do live streaming reports from OWS. That dog is part of the 1%, but apparently he’s the Warren Buffett of cartoon canines.

When I say that the press was not there, I failed to mention FOX News. They had a camera crew there, and guess who they were interviewing? First it was Little Orphan Annie, saying that all these “folks” just needed to “pull themselves up by their boots traps and get back to work”. By the Great Spirit, I hate that brat. Then Dominique Francon started blathering on about how this protest was “un-American” and why Big Business and ‘individualism” would save the country. Finally Foghorn Leghorn started going on a rant about that “colored fella” in the White House being to blame for all of this. Aunt Jemima is such a class act. She stayed off camera but got just close enough for Foghorn Leghorn to get a whiff of her fried chicken. Then she just gave him that “don’t f*ck with me” look that she does so well. I’d never seen a rooster sweat before.

So, the whole thing inspired me to help out. Of course I’m sympathetic. Let’s not even start talking about how much my people have gotten screwed by the system. Let’s just say I got those encampments whipped into shape in a heartbeat. As I’ve always told you, white people are crap at pitching tents.

So, we’re digging in for the long haul here. Wish I had some of my family blankets here for these nights, but we all have to make sacrifices. Hope all is well with you.

Tiger Lily  

P.S. I got a text from Huey. He says he, Dewey and Louie are trying to organize an “Occupy Duckburg” protest. I guess that skinflint uncle of theirs finally pushed those kids over the edge.